"I'm sorry if I hurt anybody, but that is my song."

From Saturday’s Key West Citizen Crime Report, the daily paper’s chronicle of hijinx and shenanigans, and probably the first column locals turn to over their morning coffee:

A man who heard his favorite song playing at Rick’s Bar* over the weekend allegedly couldn’t control himself and hurt two bouncers who were trying to calm him down. According to reports the man was swinging his arms and trying to pull away from the bouncers. The 24 year old Boston man was taken off the property and placed in custody on charges of disorderly conduct. “They played my song, Teen Spirit, and I went crazy,” he reportedly told officers. “I am sorry if I hurt anybody, but that is my song.”

You gotta admire the guy for his enthusiasm. On a related crime report note, the now defunct but still online blog Fresh N' Tasty used to post Monday mugshots, culling the finest and freakiest of the weekend’s detainees. Mondays just aren’t the same without a fresh haul of talent like this Underage DUI.

*Rick’s Bar is part of an interconnected maze of straight bars on the trashy end of Duval, a mini-Daytona that I like to refer to as ‘The Danger Zone’, a la Kenny Loggins. Anything bad that happens to you there is your own fault, as it’s well know how volatile drunken frat boys can be. The plus side is it keeps that crowd away from the rest of the island. So come visit peaceful Key West!